I could really use some alone time this weekend, so I think I'm going to check out that Smurfs movie.

I have Hoarders as a DVD set. I was going to throw it away when I was done, but I just can't bring myself to do it.

When I'm in a club I don't make it rain on the girls, I have a roll of quarters and I make it HAIL.

If the NFL did have a lock-out would the Canadian Football Leauge reluctantly come with?

"Eh, screw it. We'll just use Manny Pacquiao." - HP's Marketing Team

Best birthday gift ever, rain - and the subsequent smell of it on the Arizona concrete.

Am I too white to enjoy Moombahton music?

Created a group on Google+ called "Hell" so now I actually send people to a circle of hell. Dante would be so proud.

LOL has gone from meaning "Laugh out Loud" to "I have nothing constructive to add to this conversation"

Look Google. Unless we're playing Spin the Bottle or Duck Duck Goose, I don't really like putting my friends in circles.

It's 117 degrees, humid and dusty on 4th of July weekend. The terrorists have won.

"This is like if wild horses were painted with lasers." - A random user's comment on my musical selections today